chloe random

"What's becoming too much?"

"All of this.  The rules and the job and the punishments.  I can't handle it!"  

He kept eyes on me, not saying anything for a moment until finally, "finish your breakfast and come to the living room," then walked out.

I sat there for a moment pouting that he didn't listen to me and automatically decide to rescend the punishment.  But also part of me was happy with his response.

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i just need more chloe/izaak back and forth.

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"Be real with me, Chloe.  What's going on?"

I hesitated because I knew I couldn't be truthful with him.  There was so much I needed to say, yet couldn't.  There's no polite way to insert "I'm a criminal and only wanted to stay with you so you could protect me and I might need your protection because my boss is about to find out that I committed a crime against his client."

"You're thinking of what you want to say, not what you're actually feeling."

"I think I'm in love with you!" I spat, immediately regretting it when I saw the look on his face.  "No!  I didn't mean it like that."  My face was redder than it'd ever been with him and I covered it with my hands.  "I mean, I'm developing feelings.  The L-word was too much.  Ohmygod I can't believe I said that."

Izaak pulled my hands away from my face and looked me in the eyes.  "As adorable as you are when you blush, I'm not buying it, kiddo.  Something else is going on."

I searched his eyes again for any hints of what was on his mind.  That feeling crept over me again like he knew and was just waiting for me to admit it.  But I wasn't ready to tell him yet.  I could handle this on my own.

But I had to give him some of the truth because he was just too suspicious now, and I didn't want to take the chance of him spanking the truth out of me — I would break too easily with all the nervous energy I had.  "I'm scared that I'm going to lose my job and then you'll kick me out."  Hoping that he'd focus on the you kicking me out part.

"What happened at your job?"

"I just suck at it."

"There's more to it than that.  Tell me, what's going on?"

"I don't wanna talk about it, Izaak."

He blinked at my abruptness.  "You just told me that you may get fired, we're not stopping the conversation.  Tell me."

My eyes rolled.  "No means no.  Leave it alone."  I stood to walk away but he grabbed my arm.  "I don't wanna talk about itttt," I whined, tears coming naturally.

He tugged me back down to the chair.  "What did you do?  I can't help you if you don't tell me."

"Who said I needed your help?"

"Kiddo, will you relax please?  Why are you getting so defensive?  Just talk to me."

"I need a cigarette."

"No you don't.  But let's get some fresh air."  He waved down the server and paid our bill, then took me outside, putting his jacket over my shoulders to shield me from the biting wind.  We didn't speak for a second, but the silence didn't last long enough.  "You used to be more honest with me, when we were in college.  What happened?  You've been here long enough now to know that I have your back.  Why can't you tell me what's up with your work?"

"It's not that easy."

He didn't like my answer.  "What's so hard about spitting words out?  You don't have a disability and your mouth works properly."

I glared at him.  "That's not what I mean.  It's not easy admitting my faults, being vulnerable."

"Really..."

"Okay that didn't come out right either.  See?  That's why I don't want to tell you.  Everything is coming out wrong!"

He let out a slight chuckle, which helped me feel a little more calm.  "Of course you can't tell me.  You're an artist.  That's all feeling.  You'll have to express it to me through your art."

"Ha, I haven't done any art in forever."

"Maybe that's the problem."

"Maybe."

We reached the car and I let out a smile, happy that I didn't need to verbalize for Izaak what was going on.  At least with an art piece I could let him interpret it.

But when we got in the car, he didn't drop it.  "All I'm saying is that I'm a problem solver — you have a problem, so let me solve it!"

"Would you drop it already??"

"You do realize that the more you avoid my questions, my nature is to further investigate."

"Good luck with that."

"If I find out before you tell me, I'm gonna tear your ass up."

"Deal."