Violet and Izaak convo after everyone knows

“Do you miss her?” I wanted to know, gazing out at the river from our seat on the bench at Astoria park. He didn’t respond immediately, which was normal for Izaak, but cause me to glance at him for a moment. He was looking at me, eyebrows cocked in confusion, wondering where the hell that question came from. “Of course I do. Why wouldn’t I?” I appreciated his vulnerability, rather than acting like the tough macho guy I’d first thought he was. “Why though? She’s a fucking liar.” Izaak looked away, wanting to argue but, being a master of self-control, didn’t allow himself. “Chloe is… has been… a good friend.” “How? You barely even talked to her for a couple of years!” The memory of Gabe abandoning me still stung… It was hard to keep the passion out of my voice. “Even without regularly communicating, I kept an eye on her. I protected her from afar.” “But what does she bring to relationships besides deceit?” Izaak nodded, ready to turn this back on me. “You’re still upset at how she hid her true identity from you.” I didn’t want to take the bait… I wanted to keep interrogating him… but my feels got the best of me. “Obviously. I don’t know what or who to believe anymore. As if it’s not already hard enough to trust people, she just made it worse. Bro, I opened up to her, shared some dark shit, and she just lied. Didn’t reciprocate. I’m trying to make nice with her for Molly's sake, but also wanna kick her to the curb.” I sighed. “But it’s not my apartment, so not my call. I guess I need to get the fuck out.” We sat in silence for a moment, watching a couple of squirrels chasing each other. Then Izaak spoke in a low, understanding tone. “Everything wasn’t a lie. There are parts of who you saw that were actually authentically her. She’s a good friend in the sense that she really sees you. She’s curious about people and brings that to her friends. She can sense when you’re hurting and wants to make it better. She picks up on subtleties, like if you don’t want to talk about it and prefer to exert your control over her so you can feel powerful again. She knows what’s missing and helps you become whole again.”

my therapy session with violet

Violet sauntered into my office with an anxious energy, but there was a hint of something more positive that I couldn't quite put my finger on.  "How has your week been?" I wondered aloud as she plopped across from me, dropping her bag onto the floor next to her.  

"Bro, so much has happened," she exclaimed, bringing her feet into the chair to sit cross-legged.  "Where do I even begin?"  I stayed silent, waiting for her to gather her thoughts.  Finally, she sighed and looked out the window at the Manhattan skyline.  "Okay, I guess I can start with Clo.  Remember Clo?" she asked, looking at me suddenly with an intensity in her eyes.

"Of course, she's part of the 'family,' went with you to Seattle, has a crush on Toby..."

Violet smiled, appreciating my memory for random details.  "Yes.  Do you remember any other stuff?  Or did you get any impression of her?  Anything off about her?"

I raised my eyebrows.  "She's the newest addition to your friend group, like a recent transplant, right?  Maybe it's a little strange how quickly she assimilated to your group dynamics, but seems like she could just be adaptable and maybe it wasn't actually as quick as it felt to us..."

"Adaptable!"  Violet shook her head in disappointment, anger spreading across her face.

"What is it?"

Violets relapse… idk about this scene

[[got interrupted while writing this and couldn’t get back in the flow. May try again later]] “Esperanza!” I was so far into my mind and angry feels about Andy that I didn’t even notice the black suburban pull up next to me until Izaak startled me out of the daze. “Shouldn’t you be takin’ care of Clo?” I spat, looking straight ahead as I walked through the darkness. He wasn’t going to stop me from my mission. He inched up the truck to keep up with me. “She asked — insisted — that I come check on you to make sure you aren't doing anything stupid. Which judging by that baseball bat in your hand, I caught you just in time.” “Fuck off, Izaak. I don’t need a babysitter.” I swear I could hear his exasperated sigh over the distant sirens and highway traffic. “Where exactly are you going?” “None of your business,” I hissed. “Go home and take care of your girl.” That last statement was enough to make him pull over and turn off the car, allowing me to get a half-block away before he jogged to catch up with me. “Hey,” he said, almost gently, touching my arm and finally getting me to stop. My eyes narrowed at him. “Please just go.” “Where are you going?” He asked again, eyebrows raised. For a moment I imagined how easy it would be to escape, wondering why I didn’t threaten him with the bat (would he win that confrontation?) or exclaim that I could scream his following me out was unwelcome. But even in my coke-induced fury, I still had a soft spot for him, thanks to the last few weeks of us growing closer. Izaak took my hesitation as his cue to start putting the pieces together. “Pupils dilated, runny nose, restlessness, irritability… you relapsed. And now you’re heading in the opposite direction of Dominic’s, but when I drove past there Andy was outside, so you must be on the way to destroy his property.” I rolled my eyes. “I’m always irritable, you can’t prove anything.” “Do I even want to know what’s in that backpack?” I stepped back, not wanting him anywhere near the drugs I’d stolen from Andy. There was enough in there to get me locked up for intent to distribute, and if that’s gonna happen I better be rich as fuck. Izaak sensed it and just nodded, face falling in disappointment. “Violet, don’t do this,” he said, almost begging. “It’s too late. Andy fucked with me for the last fucking time.”

Molly helping out Toby’s nephew

As Chase stepped through the door, looking downtrodden and shut off from the world, I remembered the text I’d received from Toby’s sister a couple of hours ago. He’s taking the breakup really hard, she’d written. I don’t know what to do. I think it’s bringing up past abandonment shit with his bio parents. Tristen and her wife had adopted Chase about ten years ago, when he was 6, old enough to know that his parents had abandoned him but too young to know how to express his feelings about it. They’d taken him to therapy several times in the past, but he rarely took to his therapists, preferring to lock his emotions up rather than open the wound again.

“Hey you,” I said with a half smile, opening the door wider for him. “Come on in.”

Chase eyed me suspiciously before shuffling inside, b-lining straight for my room. He found Crackers snuggled up on the sofa and instantly plopped next to her, waiting for her approval before scratching behind her ears.

I took a seat beside him, waiting.

Violet & Izaak dinner

[[[Apparently this LiveJournal just turned 5 years old!  wtf.  i've been working on this series way too long.]]]

x-x-x

"Clo's still gone?" I asked Izaak as I emerged from the bathroom, freshly showered and wrapped up in one of his gigantic fluffy towels, hair still dripping.  

"She says she's working on art school applications," he said, not looking up from his laptop.  

My arms folded.  "She didn't even have the decency to tell me she was applying to art school!" I grumbled, wondering what facts I even knew about her.  

"Get dressed.  Let's go out to dinner."

"Without her?"

Izaak closed his laptop and set it aside, standing and coming towards me.  "I invited her, but she said she's already eaten.  But I'm sure you've noticed, when she gets stressed, her eating habits become an issue."

"What does she have to be stressed about?" I sarcastically wondered aloud, hoping he'd give me intel to help with my case.

Nope.  "You like Greek food?"

"Sure," I said as he walked past me towards the bathroom for his own shower.   "Way to ignore my question..." I called after him as he reminded me to get ready and slammed the door almost in my face.

Oh well, maybe I could get some info from him at dinner.